Break-up Law

An act governing the process of breaking-up, providing excuses and guidelines for performing a break-up thereof.

Section 1. Whereas breaking-up shall refer to the act of ending a relationship.

Section 2. Whereas a couple must break-up/have broken-up at least once in a kdrama.

Section 3. Whereas a person may break-up with his/her lover, fiancée, or spouse for the following reasons:

(a) He/she is in love with someone else and wants to be happy

(b) He/she thinks the opposite party is in love with someone else and wants them to be happy

(c) He/she has a debilitating, fatal, or embarrassing disease and doesn’t want to be a burden

(d) He/she was ordered/blackmailed/guilted by his/her lover’s family to do so

(e) He/she discovers a reason for hating the opposite party such as lying about his/her background, gender, motives, or financial status; being the child of the people who killed/bankrupted the opposite party’s family; having parents previously involved in crossed lovelines; etc. (oftheshore)

(f) Miscommunication in accordance with Denial of Feelings Act and Communication Devices Act

Section 4. Whereas, a person may break-up his/her relationship by the following actions:

(a) Saying: “My heart is swayed/swaying” followed by “Give me some time. My heart will stop being confused.

(b) Not showing up to an engagement party

(c) Showing up to an engagement party and running out in full view of everyone at the last possible moment

(d) Marrying one’s lover’s bestfriend and not inviting ex-lover to the wedding (see: the case of Park Gae In vs Han Chang Ryul, 2010)

(e) Plotting to kill/killing one’s spouse

(f) Going out with another person in front of ex-lover as a shorthand for “I have someone else now. I. Am. Happy. Please go away before I burst into tears from the heartache I’m giving you.

(g) Planning for one day of perfect dating, then asking one’s lover to buy ice cream or some other sad food and leaving said lover to wait indefinitely while eating two servings of Break-up Food

(h) Asking his/her lover to “talk” by the Han River and having a conversation which goes this way:

Person A: Let’s break up
Person B: Why?
A: I’m bored/I was just playing/I don’t really love you/I was in it for the money
B: Really/Was it all an act/Do you not love me?

At which point, Person A must turn away and say: “You’re right. I don’t love you. I’ve always been this kind of person, don’t you know?” all while  looking anguished/constipated – depending on the actor/actress saying said lines

Section 4. Effectivity – This law shall initially be ineffective on clingy third parties as mandated by The Second Lead Act. The break-up law shall immediately take effect at the onset of noble idiocy.

3 thoughts on “Break-up Law”

  1. Section 3. -> Or he/she has discovered that the opposite party has been lying to them about their gender or any other aspects of their background.)

  2. and in section 5 : breaking up by going abroad at the worst time possible for the ex-lover (friends or family just died) for years (to study, to get treated, to become famous), and then coming back and expecting them to wait for you.
    (well, that’s the idea but it isn’t a correct way of putting it for the law)

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